Not a working title.

This is the defining moment of my life. I will make it only if i swallow my pride. Its hard to loose something you have used to shield yourself from the real ache that life brings with itself.
I need a gulp if water to make it smooth or maybe a word or two from the good book  should do. The pain intensifies around the neck because  that is where it should go and not the head.
I am boring that i already know but, i enjoy my company of course that is me.This is not my diary but the exam was quit easy .
Here lying on my  bed staring at the cracking ceiling(its safe do not worry) I dream of what i could  be doing outside.
Making a fortune from selling my garments from Aila, or holding my chin as i inspect finished clothes in the quality assurance section of karl lagerfield's work for coco chanel. Searching for loose threads or badly plaid waist line to no avail. Who knew international tailors could be so perfect?
Daydreaming was my thing at preteen. I day dreamt a lot more of how i would  look like as an adult.well dressed, smart and brave. Well i try but not quit there yet.
The idea is to make twelve year old me proud. Would she look up to me so far well maybe..Never  be too hard on your self. Set goals and keep working towards it. If you fail today you  can't  allow yourself  to fail the same way tommorrow .
Invent new ways to fail that is how you finally succeed and become an inventor  in the long run.
You seriouly  have to make it, then reward yourself  for holding on and being faithful.